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Joke of the Day

"A pirate walks into a brothel and says... ""ARG! THERE SHE BLOWS!"" Edit: Wow 8 views. thanks guys :D"

"[Marvel Avengers Age of Ultron Spoilers] If Captain Americas shield is made of Vibranium what is Hawkeye's shield made of? Quicksilver"

"I've been reading an interesting book about rainbows and colors. It taught me different ways to view color. It's not all black and white"

"I've been repeating the same mistakes in life for so long now I may as well call them traditions."

"What does a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? In the end, someone is going to lose a trailer."

"What is a heroin addict's favorite website? Instagram."

"Just started coaching some retarded children in football The passing isn't very good yet, but the dribbling is fantastic."

"Why do married men hang strobe lights from their bedroom ceilings? To create the optical illusion that their wives are moving during sex."

"If Hilary Clinton and Donald trump go on a stranded island together who survives? America."

"I ate pelican today Never again. The bill was massive."