199731

Joke of the Day

"My DNA is all over this room. So nobody go doing anything all life-sentency in here, ok?"

"I've got good news and bad news. The good news is this tweet is almost over. The bad news is you read the whole thing."

"What do you call a poor Italian community? a spaghetto."

"I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner All it was doing was gathering dust."

"Did you know Stalin's penis was the funniest part of his body? It was real commiedick."

"Two ladies meet up for coffee... The first lady asks if she came on the bus. The other replies, ""Yes, but I made it look like an asthma attack."" (I work in a hospital, a patient told me this.)"

"How many super saiyans does it take to change a light bulb? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL Z!"

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? YOU WEREN'T THERE MAN!! - Shorty"

"Why can't you ever see a hippopotamus hiding in a tree? Because they are really good at it"

"I don't understand all the excitement over Usain Bolt I finish in under ten seconds all the time."