199617

Joke of the Day

"John Cena wakes up in the hospital Cena : Where am I? Nurse : I.C.U Cena : No you can't"

"How do you keep a moron in suspense for 24 hours? I'll post the answer tomorrow."

"I must be looking extra good today because this dude with a backpack on the side of the road was giving me the big thumbs up. Thanks man!"

"Me: Two fingers here. Son: OK. M: One in the other hole. S: Got it. M: Relax your wrist. Wife: WHAT ARE YOU TEACHING HIM? M: Bowling. Chill."

"I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am. I've been single for a while and I have to say, it's going very well. Like...it's working out.I think I'm the one."

"Girlfriend: Why is this broom broken? Did you draw a lightning bolt on the cat? Are you writing with a feather? Me: Muggles...."

"The N word. What do you call a bus full of niggers under the ocean with 1 empty seat ? A crying shame"

"What do you call the amount of time it takes to win an argument with a lawyer? An attornity."

"The first rule of Thesaurus Club is you do not talk about, name, hint at, refer to, discuss, or mention Thesaurus Club."

"Congratulations r/jokes on being the most eco-friendly subreddit! 95% of your material is recycled! (Love you guys <3 )"