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Joke of the Day

"How do you keep a moron in suspense for 24 hours? I'll post the answer tomorrow."

"In the USSR's School system it was very important not to fall asleep while the teacher was talking Or you would fail to achieve class consciousness."

"I decided to give a name to my dinner. It was a Miss Steak."

"I told my dad about the school shooting today I don't know why he got so worked up over picture day."

"The bartender says..... ""We don't serve faster-than-light particles here!"" A tachyon enters a bar."

"What are you gonna argue about with your family this Thanksgiving? 1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise"

"How many dead babies does it take to fill up my house? One more."

"what amusement park ride do jews not really care for? the holocuaster"

"""Yeah, well your dog isn't a rescue, your snacks are processed and everyone knows you're vaccinated"" - how a kid talks shit in 2015"

"A-What's up? B(londe)-The ceiling..."