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Joke of the Day

"An American soldier talks with a Russian soldier A-We get the equivalent of 3000 calories per day. R-Impossible! No man can eat 60 pounds of potatoes in one day!"

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"What do you call a muslim, jackie gleason impersonator? Muhammed muhammed muhammena."
"So there was this fish that was swimming along and saw a wall. And said, dam!"
"The hardest part about being black is never knowing if any of your family members are secretly being played by Tyler Perry."
"What do you call breakfast? Breaking fast yooo!"
"Dream girl: -tall -skinny -can pull off wearing a hat -honest -a fan of the theater -abolished slavery -is Abraham Lincoln"
"Chief: You're the WORST cop in the department! Hand over your gun and badge! Me: *realising I left both in my son's crib* Uhhhhh...."
"What is Somailias national dish? An empty plate"
"How did the hipster burn the roof of his mouth? He ate pizza before it was cool."
"The last stall in the bathroom at work Has a really, noisy creaky door when you open it. There's some scary shit going on in there......."
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