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Joke of the Day
"Hey, teenage girls, don't get pregnant. Unless you want your own TV show."
Next Joke
"A black man walks into a bar ""Can you imagine that nigga's face when the judge believes my testimony?"" - a policeman told his friend"
"How do you spot Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the fresh prints."
"Does anyone know any jokes about buttons? Topic."
"Just saw that I have one unheard message and I didn't even see my phone ring. I hope it's not: a) Work related b) Mel Gibson"
"Did you hear the one about the sexually promiscuous citrus fruit? He got lemon aids."
"Why do ruler manufacturers make a big thing about them being shatterproof? Was there a ruler shattering epidemic that necessitated this?"
"*CAN'T OPEN THE PICKLE JAR* SHERLOCK: (suspiciously) Moriarty..."
"Sorry I borrowed your pen and performed that emergency tracheotomy that turned out not to be an emergency. And sorry about your neck hole."
"What's one thing Lance Armstrong can still make money from? LIESTRONG bracelets."