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Joke of the Day

"Why can't Mexicans play Uno? Because they steal all the green cards."

"I lost 50 pounds by having my wallet stolen in London AND YOU CAN TOO"

"The reason women will never be the ones to propose is because as soon as she gets on her knees The man will start unzipping"

"I heard the kid who fell into the gorilla pit was actually trying to get the jewelry his mother dropped. He didn't get the gold but he got the silver back."

"I see you've got your bill for using the Internet Yes and my dad's really going to get the hump!"

"When birds fly in V formation why is one side longer than the other? They have more birds on that side. #scienceded"

"Did you hear about the protests going on outside of Madison Square Garden? Everyone was yelling ""Hands up, Don't Shoot"" but J.R. Smith and Carmelo Anthony just wouldn't listen."

"WHAT ARE THOSE?! Thanks, how did you know?"

"What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers."

"""Yes, I remember you saying"" - Translation: Please stop saying that"