198981

Joke of the Day

"You guys talk about sex like it's so great. I had sex once and she made me take off my jean jacket. Just not worth it."

"*licks the powdered sugar off the donuts and puts them back* Boss: I kinda like these new low-cal donuts. Real moist."

"as a teen did you ever steal your moms booze and fill it back up with water, or steal money out of her purse and fill it back up with water"

"Best place to hide stuff? Page two in Google search results!"

"What do you get when you cross a genius with a hooker? A fucking know it all!"

"What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? I can't jelly my dick in your ass."

"I would never let my kids watch the orchestra Way too much sax and violins."

"I was walking through the mall... I was walking through the mall, when I noticed this mannequin giving me a filthy look. I went over and decked the cunt and said ""Fucking poser"""

"My doctor told me that I have syphillis, gonnorhea and chlamydia. On the positive side... HIV."

"""What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?"" ""Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak."""