198552

Joke of the Day

"Knock knock Who's there? No one. You imagined the knocking due to mental illness brought on by crushing loneliness."

"I have a joke about unemployed people But it won't work."

"I've had it and I can't take it anymore ...ever since I developed that penicillin allergy."

"Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is fucked up."

"I remember when I stayed with my girlfriend and her parents for the first time, and her dad wouldnt let us sleep together Which is a shame, because he's quite attractive"

"What do you call a dance party in Colorado? Shake 'n Bake."

"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate."

"My New Year's Resolution 1080p"

"I don't understand the big deal about same sex marriage Ask any married couple, they'll tell you the sex has been the same for years"

"911,What's your emergency? Me: I think it's a heart attack 911: Can you call back when you're sure, we're watching Walking Dead"