198161
Joke of the Day
"You probably solved a problem which Einstein couldn't solve because he didn't see it"
Next Joke
"My ex told me that I was gonna die alone... I told her she was wrong because I would die while making out with a shotgun."
"Unknown person parked their car in my driveway, now it's my car. That's how that works, right?"
"Computers and taxis are surprisingly similar. They both crash when the drivers stop working."
"I'm such a great chick magnet Too bad I'm the kind that repels rather than attracts"
"Two things Twitter cultivates and encourages: 1. instant gratification 2. sense of impatient entitlement 3. misunderstanding of basic math"
"I just managed to determine someones IQ just by hearing her laugh."
"To people calling themselves ""Grammar Nazis"": you're not correcting grammar so much as punctuation or spelling. Hi, I'm a Nomenclature Nazi."
"Mr. Trump, who's your Secretary of State? TRUMP: To deal with China, one that speaks Mandarin [remembers to appeal to women] or Womandarin"
"The detective knew exactly what the murder weapon was. It was a brief case."