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Joke of the Day

"I love the compliments my boss gives like ""wow you're on time today"" and ""great job ignoring dress code again""."

"Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is"

"Best Joke on Reddit Today: <<Copy paste here from another website>>"

"Did you hear about the idiot who had a new bath put in? The plumber said ""Would you like a plug for it?"" The idiot replied ""Oh I didn't know it was electric."""

"Honestly Officer, I do have a few ideas as to why I'd get pulled over, but I'm kind of afraid to tell you. Let's both say it on 1-2-3, ok?"

"Cop: Ma'am, Are you intoxicated? Me: Are YOU intoxicated! Cop: No Me: Prove it! Cop: *puts handcuffs on me* Me: I like where this is going."

"Just because this is a public space doesn't mean my tweets are meant for ALL of you to read! Please respect my privacy at this time!!!"

"You ever seen a Polish trailer? And..here we are."

"Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Because sheep can hear zippers a mile off."

"Why did the female pirate turn lesbian? Because she did not like sea-men."