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Joke of the Day

"Wife: Whatya doin? Me: I fixed the toilet so I'm adding Potty Fixer to my resume W: You mean Plumber? M: DO I LOOK LIKE A HOUSE SCIENTIST?"

"How do you circumcise a guy in Alabama? You kick her sister in the chin!"

"Christianity jokes Q: What did Jesus say while he was getting crucified? A: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! (feel free to share yours)"

"Hell yes we can still be friends if you don't drink, I'm not that shallow. You have a driver's license, right??"

"Russia will eat Turkey for thanksgiving this year."

"Zombies What is a zombies' favorite food? Brains. What is a dyslexic zombies' favorite food? Brians."

"That's the thing with mental health It's all in your head."

"Mickey Mouse ""Doc, my knees hurt!"" Doctor: Which knee? Mickey: Disney"

"What do you get when you cross an atheist and a christian? An argument"

"I woke up one day and your name just didn't make me smile anymore."