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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross an atheist and a christian? An argument"

"You'll know when it hits 0 degrees because all the Canadians will be wearing shorts, playing frisbee and BBQing outside."

"NEWSFLASH: Billy Corgan has permanently lost his voice, and can only lip sync his songs... Going forward his band will be known as 'DUBSMASHING PUMPKINS'."

"I'm actually not funny. I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking."

"So I walked by a restaurant in Maine! It had a sign up "" Happy hour special: Lobster tail and beer!"" I said to myself. Jesus, my three favorite things!"

"Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed? To catch her false teeth."

"What is the favorite school topic of Karma Whores? Derivatives"

"What do you get when you cross an agnostic, an insomniac, and a dyslexic? Someone who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog."

"""Be careful when you follow the Masses. Sometimes the 'M' is silent."""

"I find giving things a thumbs down is a very negative response. I choose to be positive and give things the middle finger up."