197593

Joke of the Day

"My Dad got me a thesaurus for Christmas last year But when I opened it every single page was blank. I didn't have the words to describe how angry I was."

"Which athletes will not get Zika at Rio 2016? Those on Team Great Britain, because they'll leave."

"A couple was having sex in the front seat of the car. They were very horny!"

"Based on the number of AVI pics taken in your cars, I'm guessing that quite a few of you girls are on the run"

"The teacher asked Tom to make a sentence using ""frequent"". Tom: foxes frequent the nearby forest. The teacher asked: did you copy this from a dictionary? Tom: no. In the dictionary, it is wolves."

"Hubby: As a start I think you should learn to ""iron"" then we could do without the ironing lady. Blonde Wife: Well if you would learn to fuck me properly we could do without the gardener."

"A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair."

"I bought a Female Golden retriever and named her Sophia... Because she's my Golden Girl."

"Menbership (n): the fact of being a member of the Old Boys club."

"Mother: I raised you both as a mother and a father. Son: Go fuck your self."