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Joke of the Day

"50 shades of grey = my Liver"

"What's the difference between a crackhead and a John? A crackhead buys crack so he can put it into his pipe and burn it. A John pays so that he can put his pipe into a crack that might burn him."

"A significant proportion of public restroom users are assholes. The rest are all either dicks or cunts."

"Why bachelors are skinner than married men A bachelor goes into the kitchen, opens the fridge, sighs, goes to bed. A married man goes into the bedroom, lifts the blanket, sighs, goes to the fridge."

"The Id, The Ego, and The Super Ego walk into a bar.... The Id, The Ego, and The Super Ego walk into a bar. No they didn't! Yes, they did! None of this even matters!"

"A doe walks out of the woods.... A doe walks out of the woods, shakes herself off and says, ""Well. I'll never do THAT for two bucks again.""."

"A news report says hackers stole $1 Billion dollars from banks around the world. And several pens."

"I think I've found the worst pornstar name to have at the moment. ISIS LOVE"

"Why are people leaving the Ukraine? I don't know but they sure are Russian."

"Do you know why eggs are the only thing to laugh at 9/11? Because it's an inside yolk"