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Joke of the Day

"*requests to be buried in jaws of T-Rex skeleton so it looks like I went out fighting*"

"Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence. Pete fell off, who was left?"

"What presidential candidate currently has a beard? Hillary Clinton."

"Relationship Status: changing locks"

"Why was the guy with the foot fetish in a bad neighborhood? Because he heard it was the place to get toes."

"What do you call 3 agnostics sitting at a bar? I don't know."

"In the case of emergencies, why are women and children evacuated first? So that men can think for a solution in silence."

"What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horses ass? Mechanic."

"How do you spot a blind guy in a nudist colony? It's not hard."

"A man walks into a gym and asks the personal trainer which machine will make him most attractive to women.. The instructor points to the back of the gym "" The ATM machine"""