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Joke of the Day

"*puts crime-scene photos in a rocket* Ok stand back ""Detective, what are u doing?"" What does it look like, I'm launching this investigation"

"How does Dracula eat his food? In *bite* size pieces"

"Russian Roulette 5/6 doctors say that its safe to play."

"What is the saddest Olympic sport to watch? Water Polio"

"What's the difference between babies and cats People want to see pictures of your cat."

"My doctor wasn't amused when he asked how much I weighed and I said One hundred and fat"

"What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs? A condescendant con descending."

"Why did users stop coming to r/jokes? Because their jokes weren't very funny."

"Doctor Doctor I'm on a diet and it's making me irritable. Yesterday I bit someones ear off. Oh dear that's a lot of calories!"

"I'd date me. But mainly because I put out."