196248

Joke of the Day

"I feel like Trump is like Hitler Terribly misunderstood."

"I was on the street This guy waved to me, he came up to me and said "" I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else"" And I said ""I am"""

"Why is it fun to date teachers? Because if you don't get it right the first time they make you do it again ;)"

"""Can I go play w/ my Twitter friends?"" Wife: ""Are the kids in bed & the dishwasher emptied?"" ""...Yes"" *wife opens cabinet, kids fall out*"

"April is autism awareness month Anyone here aware they have autism"

"Justin has his Beliebers. 1D have their Directioners. If I ever had fans/stalkers I'd call them Tomaskateers."

"A foolproof way to get a woman's phone number is to hit her car."

"My friend is concerned about his online dating luck... I told him not to worry -- There are plenty of fish in the net!"

"You know what's a cool job?: Mirror inspector I could really see my self doing it."

"Reddit, Facebook and Twitter should merge into one company called Bridge. To bring more awareness to Bridge Trolls"