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Joke of the Day

"Every time you put on a jean jacket your middle name changes to ""jean jacket"" on your birth certificate."

"person: what is your dog's name me: he won't say"

"Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so damn good at it"

"What does a silver medalist and a pedophile have in common? They both come in just a little behind."

"[camera cuts to me in crowd at NFL game holding a giant sign that says ""I CAN'T BELIEVE THE HOT DOGS ARE 8 DOLLARS""]"

"Every time I'm around my mother in law, I wonder who is running hell in her absence."

"[Racist?] Why do all Asian kids get straight A's? Because the ones that don't are never heard from again. I'll be here all day folks."

"Mufasa didn't die, he just went out for a pack of smokes and a newspaper. - The Lyin' King"

"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? He heard the ref was blowing fowl."