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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a white duck? A quacker"

"Why are Asians bad at golf? They don't know how to drive."

"Why couldn't we get precise kinetic data on the phosphine-catalyzed reaction? The reaction rate was too phos-phor-us"

"Grandpa looks at his grandson and says, ""Go hide! Your teacher is here because you skipped school today."" The grandson says, ""No, you go hide. I told her you were dead!"""

"In WW2 my granddad broke the enigma code... machine."

"Why did the hipster's mouth hurt? Because he ate pizza before it was cool."

"What do you do when your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and maybe use some lube"

"I'd do anything to never be hungover again Except stop drinking"

"I think you should say happy birthday 4 times to everyone having a birthday today.. since they only get 1 birthday every 4 years.."

"Please don't make fun of the Holocaust My grandfather died by falling off the guard tower Edit: Spelling"