145739

Joke of the Day

"How many white people does it take to change a light bulb? A brunch."

"What do you do with an elephant with three balls? Walk him and pitch to the rhino!"

"i asked my wife to send me a naughty picture on snapchat... so she sent one of our kids playing in my electronics drawer"

"Twitter has ruined me. Just wrote ""we'll deliver your load on time"" for a transportation client and broke into peals of laughter."

"If Hillary wins, I'm moving to... Benghazi. At least I know there, she'll leave me alone"

"NSFW How is a female cyclist like a prostitute? They both peddle pussy!"

"My Mom keeps warning me about talking to strangers on the Internet. I'm 34 now Mom. I don't talk to them. I sleep with them."

"Just pressed a picture of my new Corvette against the glass of the shark tank at the aquarium & said ""You guys ain't shit."""

"Girlfriend just called me by my full given name.This is gonna end poorly."

"If history repeats itself, I'm totally getting a dinosaur."