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Joke of the Day

"You can call me a ""simpleton"" if you choose. But I ask you this. What is that. What is simpleton, is that like a good or bad thing, not sure"

"What is the lifespan of an owl? 6 1/2 books."

"Please just wear the strap-on. It was a gift from Grandma and she wants to see you in it, OK? Come ON church starts in like half an hour."

"A barber was arrested yesterday in my area for selling drugs. I've been his customer for years. Didn't even know he was a barber..."

"Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball."

"You can't spell 'jew' without the word 'ew'."

"The question is not ""Why is Instagram not working?"", but ""Why does the world need another picture of you?"" #instagramnotworking"

"How do Germans tie their shoes? In little Nazis"

"Ex girlfriends are like a box of chocolates. They'll kill your dog."

"Steven Tyler is aging pretty gracefully for a claymation skeleton who fell into a pile of feathers."