195464
Joke of the Day
"I lost my wife a year ago today. Sadly, within four days I won her back."
Next Joke
"What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent? An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO"
"My dress sock/running shoe combo says,""I do most of my running after accidentally reply-all'ing a mildly racist response to a business memo"""
"Friends are forever. Until they get in a relationship."
"Why do the melons have to have a traditional marriage ceremony? Because they cantaloupe."
"If we weren't able to stop Bieber Fever I seriously doubt America can stop an Ebola epidemic."
"What do you call an Asian wearing contacts? Customization. GET IT?? CUSTOM EYES ASIAN!!!"
"How do you make a plumber sad? You tell him that the princess is in another castle."
"One time a girl told me to take off her shirt and I was like wow ok it doesn't really fit me anyway."
"""Well, I guess I'll stagger around, speak gibberish, & touch all the shit I'm not supposed to while you get irritated."" Drunks & toddlers."