195024

Joke of the Day

"What do you call an angry German? A sauerkraut"

"I love women, especially the radical feminist types because it is more fun to put them in their place."

"Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate his pizza before it was cool"

"Change the last word of your favorite movie title to ""Impregnator"" e.g. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's **Impregnator** Transformers, Revenge of the **Impregnator**"

"Me: I love you Him: you just drank 1/4 of your beer through your nostril Me: that is also true"

"Your blood pressure looks normal, I'll fix that. - Children, every five minutes."

"I saw some beautiful women. Sometimes it makes me sad though and I almost don't want to start the chainsaw."

"I'm off to the store got your wallet? yes you sure? YES *hour later wife turns on news and I'm being chased by 6 cop cars and a helicopter*"

"Autocorrect changed 'get a life' to 'get a wife' and now my daughter is a lesbian."

"How to spot an idiot at the gym? They put a water bottle where the Pringles go."