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Joke of the Day

"I had a horrible night last night My blow up doll ran off with my air mattress"

"Why does pasta always have to pay so much for car insurance? Because it can't drive a car without making it all denty."

"What do you call a train with no motivation A Loco-no-motive"

"What did the metaphysicist say when he came out of the bathroom? shit just got real!"

"There's no such thing as premature ejaculation, the truth is that women arrive late everywhere!"

"My pot never calls the kettle 'black' because I don't buy talking marijuana"

"What do you call a gay New Zealander? A Kiwi Fruit."

"What do you call somebody who's attracted to vagrants? A hobosexual."

"[PHONE] ""TSA, How can I help you?"" Me: ""Why did you guys put my frog on the No-Fly List?!"" Agent: ""Umm..."" Me: ""DAMMIT, HE'S STARVING!"""

"What is the difference between a creep and a kid? I wouldn't let a creep sit on my lap."