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Joke of the Day

"My anchor tattoo is so realistic I can't get out of the bathtub."

"Pretty sure I just did some classical ballet move as I got off the computer chair to get to the kitchen and saw a spider on my floor."

"How do you tell a male chromosome from a female chromosome? You pull down its genes!"

"I don't get why SRS is so loud. I'm pretty sure I turned off the ""Surround"" setting."

"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. . . . . .and orders a beer. When he finishes is, the barkeep asks ""Have another?"" Descartes replies ""I think not."" . . .and POOF. He vanishes."

"Remember when you first joined twitter and you had no idea how to RT or what favstar was and remembered what your family looked like?"

"My mom called me 4 times in a row and woke me up to tell me this joke. I'm so excited about spring i wet my plants!"

"What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't gonna come."

"My crazy great Grandma My Great Grandma is 104, and she said to me: ""If the good die young, I MUST BE TERRIBLE"""

"Helen Keller walked into a bar Then a table, and a wall."