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Joke of the Day
"What do clouds wear under their pants? Thunderwear!"
Next Joke
"How many American cops does it take to change a broken lightbulb? Two. One to arrest the room for being black, and the other to arrest the bulb for being broke."
"When people show me pictures of their kids I show them pictures of my exes. If I have to look at their mistakes, they have to look at mine."
"Ever since the wife and I bought a water bed, we've drifted apart."
"I think my wife considers me her rainbow. Or at least, according to her, I'm on the spectrum."
"My sister says I don't understand irony... ....which is funny because we were standing at a bus stop at the time."
"I love playing chess with bald men in the park, but it's hard to find 32 of them. -Emo Phillips"
"I just heard ""on avarage, there are 7 people in the world that look similar to you"" omg bless you all, I hope you're all okay, I'm so sorry"
"Jesus was nailed to the cross. He said ""Peter, come forth"". Peter walks up, Jesus waves his hand and he is healed. Next he says ""Mary, come forth"" But Mary came fifth and won a toaster."
"What's better than four roses on a piano? Tulips on an organ."