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Joke of the Day

"DETECTIVE: what do you think killed these two birds? ME: [picking up the only stone near their bodies] idk maybe the bird flu."

"My grandpa use to tell us about walking 10 miles to school. I tell my grandchildren about walking across the room to change channels!"

"Heard about the public speaker with the rodent up his butt? He had to cancel a speech because he was gerbily constipated."

"Email inventor dies aged 74 I sent my re:re:re:re:re:gards"

"Why are girls so odd? they can't even"

"How many friend-zoned guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they'll just compliment it and then get pissed when it doesn't screw."

"Why did the Eskimo break up with his girlfriend? He just wasn't really Inuit..."

"A pirate walks into a bar... And sits down orders a drink without anybody making a pun about his nuts."

"I have a six figure salary.. $000,000 It's not much, but it's honest work"

"Why did the scarecrow receive a prize? Because he was outstanding in his field."