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Joke of the Day

"I ran into Harambe for the first time in a while last night, so we decided to go get a drink. Bartender: what'll you have? Harambe: I'll have a beer. Me: no, he'll have a shot."

"What does Spiderman like to get high on? Mary Jane"

"I like to throw bottles into the ocean with notes that just say, k."

"Omg, autocorrect! For the millionth time, I don't hate all those birches..."

"I'm suspicious of people who don't like dogs...But I totally trust a dog when it doesn't like a person."

"What time is it when twenty dogs and one cat get together? 20 after 1."

"Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he neverlands."

"I submitted X puns to Reddit in the hopes that one would make the front page. No pun in ten did."

"And I don't want to hear people from imaginary places like Finland telling me that 57 degrees isn't cold, save it for the elves, Santa"

"If you can't spell a word...what do you do? Find the locution"