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Joke of the Day

"Today I broke a G string while fingering A minor Dammit, playing guitar is hard!"

"Since smart watches can now read your pulse, there should be a feature that erases your browser history if your heart stops beating..."

"What's better than getting second place at the special Olympics? Not being retarded"

"My daughter just said ""I goed potty in the fish bowl"". She is a 27 year old investment banker. Why did she goed potty there?"

"Why do white peope call a Indians paiutes? Cuz paiutes was a Indians first words and they were like 30yrs old!"

"Guys, I think Trump's immigration policies just might work China built a wall and they have like, no Mexicans."

"Can I get an amen? Saw this today"

"Did you hear about the Polak who won a Gold medal in the Olympics? He was so proud he took it home and had it bronzed."

"What street do you put a lesbian restaurant on? Eater Route"

"My Asian roommate says I have schizophrenia. Jokes on him, I don't have a roommate."