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Joke of the Day
"My new girlfriend says she has a water fetish apparently it gets her wet"
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"Why does voldemort have flat face? He ran into wrong wall at train station"
"I hear a lot of black men are joining the Mexican Cartel.... I guess it takes Jaun to know De'Quan"
"Where does a vampire take a bath? In the bat-room (bathroom)."
"My wife and I recently bought a Great Dane, the smell around our house is absolutely disgusting. Every time he barks I shit myself."
"What's the smallest instrument in the world? An e-lectron."
"What do you call an animal with a long neck and a love for oranges? A Jiraffa."
"I have decided I will never get down to my original weight. Besides 7.5 pounds is unrealistic anyway."
"What did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? (NSFW) I'll see you next month."
"""Stomach...Lungs...Kidneys....Heart."" - Me, at my organ recital. (Not even slightly sorry)"