191537

Joke of the Day

"Why is your paper blank? Teacher: Why is your paper blank? Student: Sometimes silence is the best answer ! :D :D"

"Wishing for bad shit to happen to people you hate is so wrong. You gotta be way more proactive than that."

"When a big account that doesn't follow me stars me suddenly, I crouch down and stay still, hoping it will tiptoe up and eat from my hand."

"How to piss off an archeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him to determine the period."

"My uncle has one leg. He's got a second one as as well. But he also has one"

"I have a dog to make sure that the noises in the middle of the night are nothing serious and I have a cat to make those noises."

"What's a great dating app for pedophiles? Tindergarden"

"If women lactate... Then men..."

"I brought a glue gun to a knife fight. Those knives aren't going anywhere."

"I won $3 million on the lottery this weekend so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity. Now I have $2,999,999.75."