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Joke of the Day

"I won $3 million on the lottery this weekend so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity. Now I have $2,999,999.75."

"It's rude to upstage the bride on her wedding day but that's exactly what's going to happen when I burst into flames as I enter the church."

"Everything I like is either: illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive, or impossible"

"When I'm at a restaurant and see 'secret sauce' on the menu, I immediately tell the people at the table next to me"

"Why did the skinhead have Velcro on his boots? He was a lacist."

"A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much it is for a beer. The bartender says ; ""For you.. No charge!"""

"A morbid joke If serial killers kill people in series, are suicide bombers parallel killers?"

"If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were in a car accident, who would survive? America."

"The parking spot on Richard III's grave was restricted... Only two-door cars were allowed."

"What do you call an Arab who has many cows? milk sheikh"