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Joke of the Day

"Technically all panties are edible if you're ambitious enough."

"[Dirty] What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry escaped the chamber."

"My neighbor knocked on my door at 2 am this morning and said, ""Yo, I can't fcking sleep."" ""Well it's your lucky day,"" I said, ""I've got a party going on in here, come in."""

"Why can't you fool an aborted baby? Because it wasn't born yesterday!"

"Q: What's the best way to kill a man? A: Put a naked woman and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one."

"What type of pants do you need to start a car? Cargo pants"

"I think it's adorable when kids lose their teeth, they look like tiny meth addicts."

"What's the only thing worse than a worm in your apple? Reposts"

"There was a terrorist attack on a French cheese shop. Reports say there was a lot of die Brie."

"I hate working with customers I've gotta say ""hi"" all the time. (Tove Lo)"