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Joke of the Day

"How did Donald Trump won with his poor vocabulary? He's the only candidate that America finally understands.."

"HEY GUYS I'M AT NXNE! WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYBODY?"

"KFC Is like making love to a woman..... First you start with the succulent thighs then move on to the juicy breasts and at the end all your left with is a greasy box to stick your bone in"

"If you tell me your kid is 22 months and I buy it a beer, that's on you. That is your bad."

"What does fast and furious 5 and the walking dead have in common? They both have dead walkers."

"For girls who said all guys are assholes Who told you do try them all?"

"Why are elements attracted to the Noble Gasses? Because they're *Noble!*"

"Yes, Banner Ads, we want to check our Credit Scores. Almost as much as we want to pick people up at the airport and see our parents fucking."

"I got prescribed an antifungal... ... and now my girlfriend won't come near me."

"If meat is murder..... Than are blowjobs cannibalism?"