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Joke of the Day

"Paddy goes to court for armed robbery! The jury foreman comes out and announced ""Not Guilty"" ""That's Grand"", shouted Paddy! ""Does that mean I can keep the money?"""

"Brought a stapler to a gun fight and now everyone is neatly organized into piles of corpses and sorted by height. The police will be pleased"

"What does a pirate say on his 80th birthday? aye matey!"

"Just once when someone says, ""Is anyone there?"" in a scary movie, I want the villain to be like. ""What up. I'm over here. You got me."""

"Why did the frog die? It kermit suicide."

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? They don't. They arrest it for being broke and they beat the room for being black."

"What do you call it when you drop an apple on the ground? A fruit by the foot"

"Should have been called ""Star Wars: The Missing Force Kin"" Because it's all about looking for her Jedi brother."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's okay, he woke up."

"What did the frog say in the massage parlor? Rubbit."