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Joke of the Day

"I knew my camping holiday was doomed when I saw the people at the next pitch struggling with a torn ground sheet and bent pegs. It was a portent."

"Your tombstone should be carved in Comic Sans."

"My ""I hate you"" face must look very similar to my ""tell me more"" face. I'll have to work on that."

"i want all the extra fat on my body to fall off and turn into cash"

"What did the door say to the other door? I can see your Knob Simple yet effective"

"18 years ago my 4rd grade teacher said to me ""You aren't shit and you'll never amount to anything.""... I guess it's safe to say, she was a psychic. Wonder if she can predict the lottery too."

"What do you get if you cross a telephone and a marriage bureau ? A wedding ring !"

"Why couldn't the alligator satisfy his lover? He had a reptile dysfunction."

"How do you call Anakin Skywalker's padawan after getting tased by enemy? A shocked Tano."

"A blonde walks into a bar... Ouch"