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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a man with no arms and legs that falls into a body of water? Bob."
Next Joke
"what weighs more on the moon than on earth? a helium baloon"
"Just so you know, people who don't give a fuck don't talk about how much they don't give a fuck all the fucking time."
"I always avoid talking about bungee jumps when meeting new people... I just find it creates a lot of tension."
"Hmm, should I try to rip open this box with my bare hands for 20 minutes, or grab scissors & do it in 4 seconds? *starts peeling at tape*"
"""I'd do filthy things to that Princess from Star Wars"" *""What, Leia?""* ""Well obviously - but I was thinking more of a rim-job and a soapy titwank"""
"This joke is like gravity. A force."
"Do you think you'll get fake teeth when you're old and gray? Might as well. Nothing dentured, nothing gained."
"What is the worst way to find out you just came into money? via sticky notes"
"I wanted to tell a science joke. But I figured it'd be too quarky."