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Joke of the Day
"Get your shit together,... or you will die, Aria."
Next Joke
"Politicians and diapers have one thing in common... they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason."
"Thor, the god of Thunder, was riding on his filly ""I'm Thor!"" he cried. The horse replied, ""Then uthe a thaddle, thilly!"""
"The number One day,i saw a girl whose Facebook name is 70.Because of curiosity I added her.Until i have done with her and her name changed to 71, i know what her means."
"Dating is hard because guys are like ""You're hot, can we do butt stuff yet?"" and girls are like ""It's been 3 days, where's my ring?"""
"After 20 years of marriage, the one thing that pisses off my wife ... of 6 years is that I keep a running total."
"Way less people would sneeze in public if we replaced ""bless you"" with ""nice filthcloud."""
"A waiter just asked me if eat meat. I felt like a 70 year old women getting carded at a bar."
"I duct taped a stick to the front of the lawn mower today so I could feel like I was riding a majestic unicorn that eats grass super fast."
"Everyone, stop with the Jell-O jokes. They're off-pudding."