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Joke of the Day

"Caesar tried to run when the senate came after him... but his leg muscles couldn't carry him fast enough. As he fell to the ground he cried out ""Et tu, glutes!"""

"Women are like Hurricanes They come into your life wild and free and then leave with the PATIO FURNITURE WE BOUGHT TOGETHER SARAH YOU BITCH"

"What's the difference between a married guy and a single guy? Wait, let me ask and make sure it's ok to tell the joke."

"Where does an angry pirate get sent? Anchor Management"

"Why does KFC only sell christian chicken? Because the muslim ones are on the no-fry list."

"I can tell by the way you give me instructions that you've dealt with a lot of dumb people before me."

"Church is the worst book club ever. We've been talking about the same book for 2,000 years and most of us still haven't even read it"

"Bought a receiver for 99.75 $ yesterday Got a quarter back"

"I think that being a Lone Wolf is the coolest thing ever yeah.. except at the annual wolf picnic when you don't have a partner for the wolf hill barrel races."

"So this guy comes into a bar No wait... it was a horse. So this guy comes into a horse..."