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Joke of the Day
"I wanna make a joke about sodium, but Na."
Next Joke
"Why doesn't Pac-Man use Twitter? Because he doesn't like being followed."
"Currently the flower business is blooming."
"What do you do if you step on a landmine? Well standard procedure is to jump 50 feet and spread over a wide area."
"Why did the rooster cross the road? To go to the toilets, where all the cocks hang out"
"I asked a friend if he'd eat a piece of dog crap for $1K and he asked ""From whose dog?"" I'm having a hard time accepting that as a factor."
"You gotta randomly lift your girl in the air, just to let her know you could throw her off a balcony if her phone ever went off after 11 PM."
"Why do only 99.9% of dentists recommend Listerine? Because the other .1% is too busy out hunting lions"
"I'm watching this movie where Johnny Depp plays this wierd guy. I'm watching 13 movies."
"I have good and bad news WIFE: Bad news first We need a new front door WIFE: And the good news? [points to Monster Truck in living room]"