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Joke of the Day

"If Microwaves were people... They would be your one friend who always runs into something or knocks something down when you're trying to sneak into the house at 3 am."

"What is the most confusing holiday in Harlem? Father's Day."

"Wanna hear a pizza joke? Nah it's too cheesy!"

"Save the whales. Collect the whole set."

"My daughter loves all the toys she sees in commercials. So of course I have to tell her they don't exist in real life, just on tv."

"Why couldn't the pirates play cards? Because the captain was standing on the deck! Aargh"

"Who is the easiest to get a high-five from in a war? The French. They always have their hands up."

"Why didn't Johnny go to the 7 A.M. funeral? Because he just isn't a mourning person."

"How do you get a blonde to agree to a threesome? (Oc) Tell her she'll see an Eiffel tower if she does"

"A man dedicated his life to tying bits of string together. Unfortunately, it was all for knot."