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Joke of the Day

"You're like a candy bar: half sweet and half nuts."

Next Joke
 
"What does my dad do when he's drunk and bored? Beats me"
"Did you know Garfield the cat used to be a hip hop artist? Word is he used to rap with OdieB"
"Haiku of the week ""James, you have Tourette's."" ""I'm afraid there is no cure."" ""Fuck! Shit! Cunt!"" said James."
"Wanna hear my Jump Rope joke? Never mind, I'll just skip it."
"My friends tell me I'm condescending Condescending is when you talk down to people"
"I remember the last thing my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket... ""How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"""
"I can't wait to meet that special someone who will eventually ignore me."
"Wizard: Give me a burger Waiter: what's the magic word? Wizard: Abracadabra Waiter: *now a hamster* I meant please, but ok"
"If you have a shitty job, you probably shouldn't lick your fingers at lunch time."