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Joke of the Day

"Two buddies just got home from working out at the gym... Guy 1: ""Dude, were out of protein powder!"" Guy 2: ""No Whey!"""

"So my girlfriend thinks I'm stalking her. Well, she's not a my girlfriend but she will be soon."

"I'm extending the weekend one MORE day for everyone. I talked to your boss, (s)he said no problem as long as you dress slutty on wed."

"Jesus, take the wheel Carlos, take the stereo"

"The past, the present, and the future all walk into a bar It was tense."

"The past, present, and future walked into a bar... It was tense."

"The teacher took away the kids rubber-band gun.. Because it was a weapon of math disruption."

"People who say ""go big or go home"" seriously underestimate my willingness to go home. Like, it's literally my only goal for most of the day."

"What is another word for children who haven't learned how to do math? yesallwomen"

"So with the iPhone 6S coming out... I'm guessing it will be a huge 6-s."