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Joke of the Day

"Now the Supreme Court has ruled that corporations are legally a person with rights, there are a lot of rape charges I'm filing against them."

"Nothing rhymes with Trump Wait. I meant nothing rhymes with orange"

"You like sleeping? Me too! We should do it together sometime."

"What's the difference between a cat and a comma One has claws at the end of its paws, the other's a pause at the end of its clause."

"Golf is like life... the main goal of both is to get the balls in the hole."

"Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car? So they can park in the handicapped spot."

"Sometimes when my cat is sitting on a chair, I sneak up, shake the chair hard, yelling, ""EARTHQUAKE!"" Sadly, like many, she's not prepared"

"What rhymes with left and means steal? theft"

"I know this guy just hit the walk button, but I'm gonna hit it again b/c he looks like an idiot who can't do anything right."

"What do you get when you watch 'Cinderella' backwards? A woman in her place..."