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Joke of the Day

"What goes into something hot hard and covered in plastic and comes out soft and wet A frozen pizza with its wrapper left on"

"Where are the longest hairs of the body? Inside the nose. Because every time you pull one, you feel the pain until your ass."

"Best place to hide something nobody will see? Page two of Google"

"What do you call a dog with no legs? Cigarette, and you take him for a drag."

"""Not again"" ~ Me, waking up every morning.."

"If Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Mexican name?"

"Doctors have just identified a food that can cause grief & suffering years after it's been eaten. It's called a Wedding Cake!!"

"My friend David had his ID stolen the other day so now we just call him Dav."

"when I kiss a guy who has a mustache I'll close my eyes and pretend he's either Mario or Luigi, depending on his height"

"I bet when scientists throw office parties, there's always the one guy who gets drunk and carbon dates his own butt."