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Joke of the Day

"If maxi pad commercials didn't exist, us women would have no idea that we're full of blue windshield wiper fluid."

"Whats the difference between seeing a rapist in the daytime and seeing a rapist at night? At night you can only see the eyes and the grill."

"I would NOT want to have to pay Carly Rae Jepsen's phone bill."

"So I peed on my phone last night man was I pissed."

"A man got a cat and walked to his wife and said ""so what do you think of the cow ?"" His wife said that's a cat. The man said ""shh I'm talking to the cat"""

"People often say things in the heat of anger that in hindsight they regret not accompanying with a punch in the face."

"A man discovered a new medication that makes people sneeze constantly. What did he tell people in order to make them avoid taking it? Eschew! Eschew!"

"A few women sit at a table quietly..."

"What did the female mushroom say about the male mushroom? ""He's a real fun guy [fungi]."""

"Joke of the Day 6/12/14 The other day, I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up,and I said "" Did you get my drift?""."