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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between Trump's tie and a horse's tail? The horse's tail covers the whole asshole"

"I have emo shoes. They have tortured soles."

"What's the difference between Vincent van Gogh and Evander Holyfield? Are you serious? I could give you a mouthful."

"[girlfriend talking to me but I can't hear her over crunch of my cereal] ""I think we should see other people"" Yeah sure thing, babe"

"Roses are... Roses are grey, Violets are grey, i'm colourblind, and Canadian, eh?"

"You think Japanese teenagers are shocked the first time they see a real live naked woman & it's not all pixelated looking down there?"

"What do you call a cow that has abortion? Decaffeinated"

"I wished I loved anything as much as white people love saying ""gracias"" at Mexican restaurants."

"Neck Tattoos: helping employers make hiring decisions since 1992."

"I don't believe in reincarnation but damn my dog looks like he's trying to crank over a motorcycle while he's sleeping."