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Joke of the Day

"KID:I drew you a picture! ME:What's this? KID:Our house. ME:What's the orange stuff? KID:Fire. ME:Why's the house on fire? KID:I wanna PS4."

"Shout out to all the married couples who are filled with passion. Those 2 couples should hang out together some time."

"These ramen noodles taste like payday is next Friday."

"Sherlock Holmes walks into his house with a basket full of lemons. Watson asks, ""Where did you get so many lemons?"" Holmes replies, ""A lemon tree, Watson.."""

"How do farmers find their sheep in tall grass? Very satisfying!!"

"What do you call a bunch of Jews in a concert? A Moshe Pit"

"Ancient astronomers were studying the movement of the moon around the Earth After doing it for 24 hours they got tired of it and decided to call it a day."

"You know what we call comedy gold in the chemistry world? Ha2Au (I'm sorry, also the 2 should be sub-scripted but reddit wouldn't let me do that)"

"*At the ouija board* Me: Err... mom? Can't we just... Ouija board: A-N-D A-N-O-T-H-E-R T-H-I-N-G"

"Jesus was such a player.... ...he was laid in a manger"