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Joke of the Day

"Difference between a prostitute and a slut The prostitute sleeps with everybody. The slut sleeps with everybody except me."

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"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, but I dunno how they got in there."
"Why did Hitler kill himself? He got his gas bill."
"Van Gogh was never good at following directions. Everything that he was told simply went in one ear and out the- oh wait a minute..."
"How do you wake up Lady Gaga..? POKER FACE ... BAHAHAHA!!!"
"What tribe is your bicep from?"
"My wife and I always joke around. She'll ask ""What were you doing?"", then we'll both laugh and then I go make sure I cleared my web history."
"Jesus hands his iPhone to da Vinci, ""hey can you get one of me and my best buds? thanks man! HEY EVERYONE GET ON THE SAME SIDE OF THE TABLE"""
"Why aren't any atheists buying a PS4 Pro? They don't believe in higher power."
"What's long, hard, and fucks old people? Osteoporosis"
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